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Maiara Musings

"Problems can not be solved by the level of awareness that created them" Albert Einstein

Category Archives: MUSINGS

This is what I learned, one Sunday morning wandering through the beautiful art gallery.  The exhibition of painters Morrice and Lyman showcased alongside the paintings of Henri Matisse had just opened and the gallery was still quiet. There were quotations of the painters written on the wall but one quotation stopped me, leaving me no choice but to take out my notebook and carefully, word by word copy it down. At awe, I have read and reread the notation finding it profoundly wonderful. Here it is for everyone to read and enjoy. I can not stop wondering how something so simply said can be so universally true to everything we experience in life.

“There is nothing more difficult for a truly creative painter than to

paint rose. Because before he can do so

he has first to forget all the

roses that were painted”

  • Henri Matisse –

I do not know for sure if it was the lingering effects of the words of Matisse that helped me to come to my realization about the art, or was it a combination of everything happened to me in my life so far, but today for the first time I understood art. Walking alone through the art gallery – in silence – letting the paintings glide past my eyes. I was not trying to learn or understand, but to feel. I wanted the pictures, paintings, the sculptures tell the story, to draw me to them. I understood that I do not have to be skilled academic with all the technical information, I do not have to like everything I see. I do not have to understand the art to love it. I can open my heart for it. I do not have to judge it. I do not have to do anything. I can pass by the famous paintings of legendary artists without stopping just to find myself standing mesmerized in front of the small drawing by the unknown artist.

That is what I suddenly understood that one sunny Sunday morning. Going to the art gallery from now on will be quiet different experience for me, it will much more relaxing and enjoyable. I do hope that next time when you, my dear reader, go to the art gallery, or anywhere for that matter, you can do so with open mind. Perhaps you will find yourself wondering around without any predetermined mind-set being present in the moment and letting your heart guide the way. Who knows what treasures you will find.

Thank you for visiting Maiara Musings. I have to apologize for not posting in a very long time and thank you for my readers who regardless keep coming daily to read my essays. My life situation has been such that I simply has not had time for the writing. However, everything is in good way busy and I have finally gotten over my past. I am mapping my future now and it is really interesting but somewhat overwhelming at times. For those who have never visited Maiara Musings before, you might wish to read some of the essays. I have no theme really, but many are the essays relating to healing from abusive relationship.



Hi Everyone, I can see that I have missed my promised posting date at the end of each month already by 9 days. I apologize. I really have no excuse other than that my ADD is kind of worse right now because of the Taxes have to be filed by the end of this month, a relationship that is confusing the hell out of me, couple of teenagers at home with their brilliant ideas and  of course my new online course I started.

I have not posted anything about ADD on my blog yet, because I have been dealing with much bigger issues but that is perhaps something I should write about, to get my kriss crossed brain in some kind of order and to find a solution for my distraction both at work and at home. For although I don’t think that ADD is a disorder, I do know that it poses certain challenges along the many gifts it provides. And until I was diagnosed as an adult with ADD that is rather severe kind – but which has not been big problem (other than disappearing socks, keys, kids [just kidding] thoughts, time, papers, relationships and everything else practical) – I did feel frustrated and mentally challenged for most of the time and that was a big cause of feeling inferior. I could never figure it out why cooking, cleaning, parenting, taking care of practical matters was so hard and felt like I was doing a theses for PhD leaving me exhausted after even the simplest task. As an after thought I of course realize now that the exhaustion is not from actual task, but from the huge concentration it takes to be able to finish the task in any kind of reasonable time that for most would only take fraction of time and no effort to finish.eep

So it is a lengthy excuse, but please have mercy. I will see about the essay for the end of the month and I truly try to stay true to my word. However, since I have like so much going on right now I can not promise for sure that I have time to write a full essay on subject matter. I will keep you posted and let you know regardless at the end of this month the good news I am bound to have.

Enjoy the spring and sun and please remember, world is not about disorders but variety. We all have our peculiarites and that should be a gift for world would be very boring place if everyone were to think same way or to look the same way. Variety it what we need and what we should embrace, not tame.

Thank you for visitin Maiara Musings


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Here I am, sitting at work in a basement where my desk is, with no heating system. The not so quiet humming of the heater beside me and my new finger-less gloves  keep my otherwise frozen hands functioning so that I can work. It is cold in Canada this year, no matter where you go. I have spent time thinking about something optimistic about this winter. There are few things that I can say are great

1) When the spring and summer finally arrives everyone will be able to appreciate the weather and there will be way less weather related complaints than usually

2) While defrosting my windshield wipers this morning and praying that the car would start, it came to me to count my blessings that I do have a car – less the garage since the divorce of course.

3) The mold does not grow in this frigid temperature neither does my fire alarm go off from the steam after my shower.

4) Since I have a legitimate reason not to go out running this winter due to weather hazards I don’t have to feel guilty. I can instead spend that time writing and relaxing at home.

5) I have definitely decided that when I move next time, I shall wish for a fireplace. For what would nicer than enjoying a glass of wine in front of a fire-place looking in to the mesmerizing glow of fire……

6) And lastly, snow is not melting and kids are having a blast going skiing more than usually

So, now that I wrote down all this I feel much happier already and instead of feeling sorry for myself and depressed I come to realize that it is not the weather that dictates the state of my mind, but my spirit. And right now my spirits are very high, for I am so happy. Please take out your pens and write down your own lists of seasonal reasons, there are many ways to be happy and appreciate the day just the way it is. I better post this now and return to my work. Those who have not visited Maiara Musings before please take your time and check out my essays.


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